Did you know that 28% of married women are the bread-winners in their family? And over 65% of women overall are in the workforce. That’s a huge jump from the 50s and 60s where many women stayed at home and cared for their families. So why are people still acting like it’s weird to make more money than your spouse as a woman?
Here’s Why It’s Okay to Make More Money Than Your Spouse
Here’s the thing — it’s okay to make more money than your spouse, and it’s nothing you should feel guilty about. Here’s why things are different and why women shouldn’t feel bad about bringing home the bacon!
The Tides Are Changing
When you think about the statistic above, that means that almost 1/3rd of working women bring in more income than their husbands. That’s a sizable jump from the 13% of female breadwinners in 1980, and that number is continuously growing. The tides are changing, and many women are coming to understand that it’s okay to make more money than your spouse as a woman.
With women quickly catching up with men in terms of earning money and holding down lucrative careers, I can bet that women will be ruling the world (in the forefront) in the near future. It’s okay to embrace the change.
There’s More To A Marriage Than Finances
Is financial security important?
However, it isn’t the number one most important thing in a relationship, especially a marriage. Support and communication are. You shouldn’t feel like you have to depend on your husband to bring in the income if you’re can do it yourself. A strong and independent woman is sexy, and as far as I’ve heard, many men appreciate it.
Plus, being able to focus on more important aspects about your relationship, versus who’s paying the bills, can help you create a more well rounded, and respected, marriage overall. Which brings me to my next point…
Your Spouse Most Likely Doesn’t Care
I remember being so afraid of talking to my husband about a promotion. But when I finally sat down and told him, his smile grew super wide, he held me in a big bear hug, and he said “Congrats baby, I’ve been rooting for you. You deserve it”.
- My husband didn’t care that a raise meant that I would be earning four dollars more than he was earning.
- He didn’t care that I was earning more than him.
- He didn’t care that I was the breadwinner in the family.
The only thing he cared about was that I was succeeding in something that was important to me.
Unless your spouse is constantly trying to down you, your earning potential, or your career, most likely, they’re totally fine with you making more. If you need to have a conversation to put your fears at rest, do so. But also know that your spouse is more supportive and proud of you than you think they will be.
Men aren’t the only high earners and breadwinners out there. And with the shift in societal norms, more and more men are becoming comfortable with bringing in less money than their spouse.
Working hard deserves reward and compensation. Getting a promotion, finding a career or job that fulfills you and pays you well, or becoming the head of your department are all huge accomplishments. And you deserve to be proud of all of that.
I wouldn’t even look at it as you making more money than your spouse. I would look at it as you accomplishing career goals and being paid for the time and work you put into your career. Just like I’m almost positive that your spouse is supportive and proud of you, you should be for yourself too. It truly is okay to make more money than your spouse.
The only thing I will say about this is to not rub it in your spouses face. Don’t say “Well since I pay the bills and bring in the money…”. Sometimes, we can become so into the fact that we’re financially secure, that we shame others for not being “on our level”. But if your spouse is supportive and respects you, it’s important to offer them the same kindness and love.
What About You? What’s Your Take?
Financial security, independence, and accomplishing career goals are all fine and dandy. And, it’s also okay to make more money with your spouse. With the times changing, and more women becoming comfortable in being a part of the workforce, earning more money than your spouse is going to be something so common, most people won’t even blink when they see it happening. So why should you?
Having said all this, I want to know what your take is?
Ladies: Do you make more money than your husband? Do you think it’s been positive or negative on your relationship?
Guys: Does your wife earn more money than you? What if she did? Would that be a problem for you?
I can’t wait to hear all your thoughts and comments below!!
AUTHOR Kimberly Studdard
Kim Studdard is a project manager for online entrepreneurs and small businesses. When she isn't spending time with her daughter and husband, or reading her growing pile of horror books, you'll find her working on her HR degree and working towards FIRE.